Most statements in life fit into either the ‘fact’, ‘fiction’ or ‘opinion’ category. However, it seems that some black men (and I use that term loosely), are attempting to break the rules of life, and believe if they repeat their opinions long enough, they will start to become factual. What they have achieved, in fact, is a whole new category of ‘delusion’.
‘Black girls are ugly’– fiction. Correction, ‘black girls are ugly’– opinion. Sorry, ‘black girls are ugly’– delusion. ‘Black guys who say black girls are ugly should have been the product of masturbation’– FACT.
A recurring topic of conflict between black males and females is the black males’ denunciation of the black female race. I’ve seen and heard black males constantly put black females down ‘all black girls are ugly’, ‘I can’t run my fingers through a black girl’s hair’. Can we pause just for a second to question what the pressing need is for you to run your fingers through any girl’s hair? Okay, I get the romantic gesture of maybe playing with a few strands, wrapping them around your finger while you gaze lovingly into her eyes. But to take your four whole fingers and thumb and push them through the length of her hair, roots to end? Um.
Okay, let me continue. Now, I’m not one of those black girls with a Jackson 5 afro, who believes every word India Arie sings is gospel and who spends 140 characters of every tweet proclaiming that ‘black is beautiful’. I am actually of mixed heritage and therefore feel I have an unbiased opinion of this issue. After all, if it wasn’t for interracial dating, I wouldn’t exist. But I totally get why black girls would have issues with interracial dating, and the reason for that is YOU. Let me clarify some things for you though. If Tom wants to date Shaniqua, it is highly unlikely that any black girl would have an issue with this. Why? Because Tom doesn’t cuss Laura, Jess and Beth in order to appreciate Shaniqua. He appreciates Shaniqua for being Shaniqua. However when Tyrone wants to date Chloe, it’s often because Shaniqua is ‘too loud’ and Shaniqua is ‘too hard to deal with’ and Shaniqua ‘argues too much’. How often do you hear black men say ‘I need to get me a white girl’? Not because he loves the glossy, milky radiance of Caucasian skin and the way her wispy hair blows in the wind, but because the alternative is ‘too hard’ to handle. Are white girls not insulted by this? Being the easy alternative is not a compliment but some will sit there and giggle and blush when a black male is cussing black females.
A girl is not beautiful because she is black, neither is a girl ugly because she is white. Let your choice be a girl you find attractive who, only HAPPENS to be whatever race she is. Black girls do not ‘hate’ on white girls in interracial relationships because we want the black guy in the relationship. Negro, please. However, black men are the cause of this resentment we feel towards such relationships and therefore should take responsibility for it. I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion and their own preference. What I don’t condone, however, is an insulting, offensive public declaration of your preference.
One thing that REALLY gets to me is the phrase ‘she’s nice for a dark skinned girl.’ We all know that dark skinned girls bear the majority of the insults. It shouldn’t be like that, but it is. How dare people suggest that being dark skinned is a disadvantage? Like it’s the Paralympics -‘he plays football well for a blind man.’ As if being darker already puts you at a disadvantage and therefore if you’re pretty, you deserve bigger recognition. And who has defined what shades are beautiful? Largely, the media has. What’s interesting is that black females don’t fall for this. We see the likes of Gabrielle Union and Kelly Rowland we see beauty. Maybe inwardly we’re affected, but it’s very rare that we would publicly express these thoughts should they exist. We have grown something called solidarity. Why put our sisters down when the rest of the world already does? Black men, strengthen your minds. Your opinions are weak because the minds they come from are weak.
One of the things I have learned growing up, is that the people I am attracted to, attract me because of their qualities, not because of someone else’s apparent downfalls. What do I mean? By all means, be with Becky, breed Becky, MARRY Becky because to you, Becky is amazing. NOT because, Shaniqua is too loud, and Shaniqua is too much to deal with and because you can’t run your fingers through Shaniqua’s hair. Speaking of hair, you have a problem with weave? My brain cells aren’t able to wrap around the foolishness of this statement. How many of you would approach Meagan Good with an afro? You hate that black girls wear weaves, you love that white girls have ‘natural’ hair? Do you even know how many white girls have hair extensions? Trust me when I say fake hair is not just a ‘black’ thing. Why must you be negative about one race in order to be positive about another? And while you, black men read this blog, cussing my views, calling me a ‘hater’, your mother, Shaniqua is downstairs cooking your dinner.